


Knitting Soothes the Troubled Spirit

by evol_love



Category: Pacific Rim (2013)
Genre: Crack, Knitting, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-07-30
Updated: 2013-07-30
Packaged: 2017-12-21 19:58:22
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,462
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/904278
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/evol_love/pseuds/evol_love
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Newt is endearingly terrible at knitting and Hermann thinks it's kind of hilarious.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Knitting Soothes the Troubled Spirit

**Author's Note:**

  * For [phonecallfromgod](https://archiveofourown.org/users/phonecallfromgod/gifts).



> 100% ANNA'S FAULT. AGAIN.
> 
> “Properly practiced, knitting soothes the troubled spirit, and it doesn't hurt the untroubled spirit either.”  
> ― Elizabeth Zimmermann

No one is exactly sure how it started. It might have been Christmas presents, or needing a hobby after one-too-many nervous breakdowns. Perhaps it was those ridiculous Kaiju Mittens he’d tried to manufacture, or maybe he just needed a creative outlet to help deal with the impending apocalypse. Regardless, the point is, Newt Geiszler enjoys knitting.

Well, “enjoy” might be the wrong word. It’s more of a “challenge accepted” situation involving a lot of swearing and bleeding and yelling things like, “I have multiple doctorates, dammit!” when he thinks no one else is around. 

People do their best to steer clear of Newt when he goes into knitting mode, for two simple, basic reasons: 1) People tend to get injured around Newt and knitting needles, and 2) Newt is the _worst_ knitter the world has ever seen and he often gives away his latest creation to whoever is standing closest. 

Aleksis is the first fool to get close enough to Newt for him to thrust an object resembling, roughly, a pile of yarn at him. He stares down at it in confusion but Newt looks so pleased with himself that he tries for a smile and says uncertainly, “Thank you?”

Newt grins wider. “First one I ever finished.” As if that was helpful to Aleksis in determining what exactly it was. 

He brings it back to Sasha who wrinkles her nose and says, “What is that?”

He shrugs. “I think Dr. Geiszler...knitted it?”

Sasha barks a laugh before covering her mouth and saying, “I think he knitted you a hat.” She plunks it on his head, and he has to admit it does vaguely look like a hat, though there are more holes in it then necessary, and it’s a tad lopsided. He glances back at Sasha, who is definitely on the brink of uncontrollable laughter. He swoops in and kisses her to shut her up. “If you think it’s so funny, why don’t _you_ go see what Dr. Geiszler’s fashioning next?” he knows she can’t resist a challenge.  
\-------------------------------------------  
“Oh, it won’t be finished for quite a while,” Newt is telling Sasha when Hermann walks into the lab. She has the look of someone trying to look like they’re seriously paying attention while they’re actually incredibly amused. So Hermann feels completely justified in whacking the back of her leg with his cane as he passes by. 

She swears violently in Russian and gives him a hard look.

“Oh, terribly sorry, Lieutenant Kaidanovsky,” he says easily. “This damn leg has been getting worse lately, it’s all a bit out of my control.”

“Shit, are you alright?” Newt asks in the tone of a coddling girlfriend. He swoops in protectively, allowing Hermann to lean against him. Then he looks up at Sasha. “He’s been a bit off balance lately, you’ve got to watch your step around him.” She just rolls her eyes at Newt, not buying this shit for an instant. Newt turns back to Hermann, whom he’s still holding protectively. “Are you alright, Dr. Gottlieb?”

“I think I may need a lie down for a moment,” Hermann says seriously. Sasha snorts and turns to leave. She doesn’t think she imagines the moan of, “Fuck, do that again,” as she walks down the hall.  
\------------------------------------------------  
When Christmas rolls around, everyone is tense. They all know the gift of Christmas piles of yarn surely await them from Newt, and aren’t exactly sure how they’ll deal with Newt’s sincerity coupled with how secretly _terrifying_ Dr. Gottlieb is where Newt’s concerned. It’s like he’s in kindergarten and pulling an “only _I_ get to make fun of him,” move on everyone else. They’re such children, honestly. 

Sure enough, when the holidays hit, Sasha and Aleksis are greeted with twin sets of what they’re pretty sure are supposed to be socks, Tendo finds something that’s likely mittens on his desk, Mako is treated to another one of those charmingly awful hats, and the triplets spend hours trying to figure out what their gift is (they were supposed to be scarves, they learn later). Even Pentecost is amused and dismayed to find a pathetic afghan blanket draped across the chair in his quarters. 

No one is even a little bit surprised when Hermann shows up at the Shatterdome Christmas party in a sweater slightly worse than the ones he already wears (which is saying a lot). Sasha is smart enough not to say anything, since she still remembers being _viciously attacked with a cane_ in the science lab. Chuck is brave enough, or stupid enough, or probably both, to ask him where he got the trainwreck of a garment, but Hermann doesn’t even twitch. He just smiles vaguely in a subdued sort of way that means he knows something Chuck doesn’t.

The look is explained fifteen minutes later when Newt joins the party and exclaims, “Oh my god, you’re wearing it already! Do you like it?”

“Of course I do.”

Sasha smirks at Aleksis. “It would seem Dr. Gottlieb isn’t just smart about mathematics...”

Pentecost actually shields Mako’s eyes from the display that follows.  
\---------------------------------------------------------  
Chuck is not amused by the hideous mittens he finds in front of his door the following morning.  
\---------------------------------------------------------  
“Good morning, Mako! How’d you like the hat?” Newt asks Mako cheerfully. 

“It was a hat?” she says without thinking. Hermann, whom she hadn’t noticed by Newt’s side, coughs meaningfully and she remembers herself. “I mean yes! The hat! Yes, it’s great, thank you Dr. Geiszler!” She casts a nervous smile at Gottlieb, who nods approvingly at her and continues walking down the hall. She half-sprints to Tendo’s station and warns, “I don’t care if you don’t even know what it was, _wear Newt’s Christmas gift today_ Dr. Gottlieb’s in a mood.” Tendo looks incredibly grateful.  
\------------------------------------------------------  
Hermann has to admit, seeing the entire Shatterdome in knitwear that day is one of his greatest accomplishments to date. Who knew that having a cane and looking mildly threatening next to your ridiculous boyfriend could scare people into wearing shittily made scarves and socks?

“Wow, everyone loved their presents.”

Hermann’s lip twitches and he looks up at Newt, who has crept up beside him. “Yeah, they sure did.”  
\----------------------------------------------------  
Newt does actually get better at knitting. That’s not to say anything he makes is of any quality whatsoever, but at least now his projects look like what they’re supposed to look like, albeit sloppy and lopsided. Hermann encourages him by discouraging him, knowing full well the exact effect his actions have.

“Honestly, Newton, will you put those needles down for two seconds?”

“I’m going to start calling you Dr. Geiszler again.”

“That sweater isn’t even passable.” (It turns out the “sweater” was a blanket)  
\--------------------------------------------------  
Newt gives up on the knitting the day the Kaiju emergency increases to the point where Pentecost brings Raleigh in. Everyone is tense, with hard lines on their faces and sharp orders and silences that go on far too long. 

When Newt is off chatting with Hannibal Chau, Hermann goes to see Pentecost and notices he has the fucking blanket Newt knitted him for Christmas draped across his lap, and Hermann has to excuse himself before he can even talk to the man for fear that Pentecost will actually make him fucking cry.  
\-------------------------------------------------  
The day after the breach closes, Newt hands Hermann a scarf with a completely deadpan expression. 

“Did you buy this?” Hermann asks uncertainly, at a loss for words.  
“Nope,” Newt says, his smile growing.

“Did you get someone to make this for you?”

“Nope.” Newt’s smug now.

“Did you-”

“Hermann you know I made it myself. Stop playing around.”

“You made this?”

“Of course.”

“But it’s...it’s good.”

“Best I’ve ever made, I think.”

“Did you really make me a, ‘congratulations we didn’t die’ scarf?”

“You know I did.”

Hermann wraps the scarf around his own neck, then leans in to kiss Newt, who tugs him down to his own level using the scarf.

“Mmm, I think you need more scarves. Makes this a lot easier.” Newt pulls him in again, and Hermann sort of has to agree with Newt’s statement.  
\-------------------------------------------------  
“I hate you both I will never wear anything you knit for me ever again,” Mako declares as she walks into the lab and finds Newt pinned against the wall, his wrists tied with Hermann’s scarf. Newt notes absently that she looks like she might really cry. He figures Raleigh will probably yell at him about this later, but he’s really not bothered about that at the moment because Hermann is doing things with his tongue that should be illegal.

“Raleigh’s going to see this, you know! We can still see each other’s memories!” she yells before storming out of the lab. 

Newt can’t remember ever laughing harder during sex in his entire life.


End file.
